Expectation vs. Intention

Well, it’s been one week since I said farewell (for now) to the corporate world and started my journey into entrepreneurship. I add (for now) because I am learning to let go of extremes/ultimatums and am actively working on shifting my mindset from black and white to one of more fluidity and living in the gray (i.e: uncomfortable) zone.

The Cheesecake Factory Menu Syndrome (Analysis Paralysis)

I generally like to write about themes that keep popping up in my life as there is generally a lesson hidden, or not so hidden within them.

Lately The Cheesecake Factory has been coming up in conversation which may seem random but allow me to explain to you why it’s not.

Living by "The Shoulds"

Lately I’ve really been noticing the word “should.” I’ve been noticing the prevalence of it not only in my own thought process and vocabulary but in the vocabulary of others…...and the more I have been noticing it, the more curious I’ve become.

The Holiday Emotional Shuffle

It’s been awhile since I have written for reasons that I won’t go into for this post and man have I missed it…..but I’m back at it as we are WELL into the holiday season.

Less Doing, More Being

Every day, day in and day out, we push ourselves to do more and to be more. We constantly look to how we can achieve more and for many of us on the road of self-development, we are constantly looking to how we can improve ourselves.

And yet we are exhausted, disconnected, burnt out, forever in grind mode. We feel we are on a hampster wheel with no way off. We are human beings but we have forgotten that whole "being" part and yet that is the missing piece for so many of us. We must learn to listen and trust the store-house of wisdom held in our bodies.

We want more answers, more connection, more clarity, more peace and more authenticity in our lives but that won't be found in our never ending to do lists or getting caught up in the nonsensical tape recorder that is our mind.

It is found in the body. It is found in stillness. It is found in rest. It is found in nothingness. It is found in simply being. Seems so simple yet we resist it. So just for today, give yourself a break. Find some time to be alone and in silence. Put your hands over your heart and breathe into it. Focus on the rise and fall of your breath and trust that you are ok. This moment is enough and you are enough.

The Fear of Failure

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The fear of failure is strong within many of us *raises hand.* Endorsed by a culture of misguided perfectionism, we get stuck in our heads about making the "perfect" decision and we put immense pressure on ourselves to do things just right.

And where does that get us? It makes many of us sick with stress both emotionally and physically and even more tragically, it keeps so many of us stuck and from achieving our dreams. We have so much to offer this world and yet we hold ourselves back.

So what's the truth? There is no "perfect" choice because there is no such thing as failure. We think there's some almighty "right" and "wrong" decision that will lead us to the perfect path but the reality is there's just choices. And then there's feedback from those choices, learning from that feedback (if you choose to do so) and moving forward with new information that will bring us and our lives more into alignment of what we do want.

It can be a profound mindset shift that can not only ease our rampant decision anxiety but also offer us the space and freedom to create more and dream bigger. We can begin to release the shackles and burden of perfectionism and fear of failure so that we become liberated enough to actually begin creating the life we do want.

So what would you do if you knew you could not fail? How could you bring more compassion into your past, present and future self/life knowing you have never been and never will be a failure?

Less Striving, More Living

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We spend so much of our time either trying to plan out our lives or we are in speculation about them. We are constantly thinking about the past or worried about the future. We wonder what we could have done differently or we constantly wonder how we can make ourselves and our life better.

There's nothing wrong with setting goals and and making plans to achieve them but we are often so busy living in our heads trying to "figure out" ourself and our life that we often miss out on actually living.

What if we dropped all of that just for today? What if we looked up from our phone or computer and got present to our bodies or the environment surrounding us? What if we stopped trying to figure it all out and realized that everything right here right now is exactly what it should it be? What if we could relax for just a moment and breathe into knowing that we are in the right place at the right time?

So many of the answers we seek lie in the moments when we are not trying to figure it all out. They are in the moments when we are connected to the life happening in front of us. So try taking a moment today to get present to yourself and your life. Feel your feet on the ground, actually listen in the conversation you're having, really taste the food you're eating. Be an active participant in the life happening around you instead of the one you are imagining in your head.

The Black Emotional Experience

……...But many of us have not moved forward emotionally. The pain of our ancestors is quite literally still running through the blood in our veins. We have not yet broken the cycle and so we continue to live our lives partially hidden. We laugh and joke and try to ignore that heaviness in our heart; that sinking feeling in our stomach; the anxiety that keeps us up at night.

The Path of Spiritual Growth Ain't Always a Pretty One

Just a gentle reminder that sometimes spiritual growth, or any growth for that matter is not always cute.

Sometimes with all the beautiful images on social media and/or in other media channels of doing yoga on the beach, meditating on a cliff, being surrounded by various crystals and reading angel cards, it's easy to think that this is what growth (or at least the path to it) looks like.

Our Resistance to Death

We as a culture cannot stand the idea of death. We don’t like what we are confronted with when some aspect of it is presented to us. I am not referring to actual physical death yet that’s what our avoidance is based on; our fear of our own immortality. We welcome new beginnings but run away from the end yet cannot happen without the other.